at a certain age…

I have been thinking a lot about my age lately. It is obvious, because we just welcomed a brand new year to our lives. As each passing year came and went, I often ponder about holding time at a pause. What would happen if I can have that supernatural power to just hold time, pause, go back, and or fast forward then go way back again? I am greedy, I know, but I also know you have the same kind of wish. Don’t we all?

At a certain age, a large amount of our brain synaptic connections withered and died if we don’t use them frequently and repeatedly, so we are left with just a few to get us going with the motion. (That’s a sad part about aging! *sob*)

The reason I titled this post as such is because I am stuck at writing this one piece of article. Not an essay, or academic paper, just a piece of web content to be put on a website. And yet, I am stuck after the second paragraphs. This spiral downfall of synaptic wirings is partially due to the inactive brain connections after being a stay-at-home mom for more than two years. I have not done any real writing (blog posts don’t really count because these are just my jibberish!) and suddenly I don’t know how to compose a succinct and well-written piece. ***Pulling hair***

I wish in college I had dedicated more time to taking more English courses on top of the general requirement. I wish I could go back and be an English major, with a minor in Math or something to complement the other side of my brain.

Once in a while Mr. O asks if I regret getting both undergraduate and graduate degrees in something that I don’t actually practice. Of course, in some parts of me, I do regret, because my degrees are not something tangibly practiced like law, medicine, teaching, and or tech-driven fields.

But in some other ways, I felt that how life led me there and then now was already destined. As human, we always look back in hindsight at the choices we made for retrospection, because now we knew what it took us to get “here”. But at the time, I just went with what I felt was right, like a calling, and banked on whatever opportunities the future brought.

Well, my calling was intercultural communication and relations; at that time in college, it felt right to pursue that path. I was not strong enough in Math and Science to give it a try (I blamed that Calculus course the first semester of freshman year of college that gave me nightmares!) but inclined to the the inter-discipline of liberal arts. So if I were to go back to those years, I would give Math and Science a try. Seriously, I would!

Back to reality, I am still struggling to get this piece of web content done. ***pulling hair again***

Where is the time-machine?

I need to jump on it and go back in time to rewire my synaptic brain connections. 😀

Wait, what did I just write about? Never mind, another set of brain wires just went six-feet deep. And I am amazed that some of you would get to the end of this blog post with me. Congrats, a chunk of your brain synaptic wires are also going downhill with me.


3 thoughts on “at a certain age…

  1. Your path lead you to Mount Holyoke, where you created so many opportunities and changed so many lives. I cannot thank your liberal arts majors enough for making our paths crossed!

    1. Thank you Em! Meeting you and other girls at MHC has always been a major part of my life. I guess that’s a reward for going my liberal arts route!

  2. Nàng nói làm tui cũng giật mình nhen. Ừa, đến tuổi này rồi, trí óc chạy đâu ráo trọi rồi á nàng ui. Nhiều khi cầm cuốn sách lên đọc, đọc xong, quên béng mất là mình mới đọc thứ gì á. Quái chiêu chưa? 😦

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